Let’s just say I have a friend, Tiffany who is not the cheating type, she loves her husband, but recently asked me if she was being ‘Financially Unfaithful’ by not disclosing how much she really spends on shopping. We’re not talking grocery shopping items either… Sneaking in designer shopping bags with a trail of receipts hidden on top of the wardrobe is commonplace. He often asks, “Is that new?” ‘’Oh, this old thing I’ve had it for years and forgot I had it”.
The day starts out with good intentions trying to control the demons of the urge to splurge, but her penchant for designer labels make it difficult to control spontaneously trawling through the latest collections on Instagram feeds and Vogue magazines, eluding to ‘the it bag’. The problem is she thinks she is saving money if she buys on pre loved luxury sites. The reality is, it is a short-term fix with emotional fulfilment until the next ‘’must have accessories’ arrive, something she is well aware of.
Shopping overseas is also a temptation when on holiday, some of us have an inbuilt Satellite Navigation system on the fashion radar. Tiffany went shopping on a previous holiday to Hawaii and tried to keep her purse strings in check, but then couldn’t get the image of the new Tory Burch dress and Armani jacket out of her head. Her husband said ‘’If you can get us back from the other side of the island we will go there”. “Don’t worry she said I have homed in on the short cut, I can definitely get us there”.
Some subscribe to the “Cash is king” theory, Tiffany says her “purchases don’t show up on the credit card statements or bank statements, therefore untraceable!” and she has that element of financial independence. LOL. Cutting back on non-essential items is not easy to do when you are used to a certain lifestyle, but the temptation to acquire the latest fashion items are always there. Men generally have a different viewpoint when it comes to accessorising or being labelled fashion victims. It is more difficult for them to hide their purchases ie. New car, investment property, new house. They tend to splurge on more key investments rather than superficial items, as they call them.
Whether it’s excessive shopping, overspending or hiding funds in a secret account, financial infidelity comes in any forms and can be easy to hide. Apparently, this is a common problem and statistics don’t lie – financial stress is the main cause of relationship breakdowns with over 40% of couples distressed about their finances. The old saying of hope for the best and plan for the worst rings true.
The Devil is in the detail (designer of course) and the Devil still Wears Prada!